4 votes
Jul 7, 2015

I'm all for taking responsibility for your actions, but that's too simple a question to get valid responses from.

A man and women are 50% responsible for creating a child, but currently in society, it is not an equal decision, and it depends on where you live and mainly comes down to money. (Men currently have more decision power in less than democratic societies {i.e, they still own women}, but have less decision power in more democratic ones, barring wealth.) I think it should be equal for everyone all the time. No more treating women as chattel, but no debtors prison for child support either.

But go ahead and apply the societal differences (that are real world examples) to all the following more involved questions. What about rape? Incest? Affairs? What about if an older woman gets pregnant from a minor boy? What if a DNA example is not determined until after the child is a few years old? (Divorce, Adultery, Adoption, or as it has happened in real life, fathers have been forced to pay or even chosen to pay even though the child is not genetically related.) What if the pregnancy prevention methods didn't work (I'm assuming both consenting adults engaging in sexual activity didn't want a pregnancy and were actively using one or more forms of birth control) and afterwards the woman decides that she wants to keep the child, but the man doesn't, or even can't afford it? What if that situation is reversed?

What if the participants are not actually knowledgeable about sex, or birth control? That happens in even modern societies.

There are too many real world variables for this simple question to accurately answer it in a poll, and none of them have simple answers.

Reply to this opinion
main reply
4 votes,
Jul 7, 2015

"There are too many real world variables for this simple question to accurately answer it in a poll, and none of them have simple answers."

I don't think it's very complicated. As a woman, you know that if you have unprotected sex, the consequences will eventually be another human life growing inside you. Society does everything it possibly can to ensure that every woman knows this....we live in the Information Age so making excuses for women and men who don't understand the consequences of sex is holding them to a dangerously low standard of responsibility. This is not impoverished Africa without computers and with voodoo doctors - this is a first world country with computers and mandatory public programs which explain the science of sex.

Given that as a woman, you know that unprotected sex leads to children, if you don't want a man to be the father of the child, DON'T have unprotected sex with them! If you do want him to be the father of the child, then get a legal commitment from him (marriage) or DON'T and take the risk that he will leave and you'll be stuck with the bill. This is not rocket science and this is not unfair AT ALL. You can't play Russian Roulette and then claim to be a victim when you get a bullet through your skull.

It is a completely patriarchal mindset to absolve women of this basic responsibility. "Oh, the poor woman had no way of knowing the man would leave as soon as she was pregnant!" Really? If she was so confident that he would stay, why didn't she marry him? If she was so confident that he wanted to raise a child with her, surely they would have had numerous discussions on how they would raise the child, the financial logistics, the time logistics, etc etc. The truth is, irresponsible women avoid having these conversations and avoid marrying men who they have unprotected sex with because they fear knowing the actual truth about the man they're with - and as a result of their cowardice they end up pregnant, abandoned, and then play the victim.

Challenge someone to answer this opinion:
Invite an OpiWiki user:
Invite your friend via email:
Share it: